S03 E14 - TOW Phoebe's Ex-Partner
aka TOW a Wooden Leg, a Nubbinectomy, and a Jingle Bitch
SIGNATURE BEVERAGE: GINGER’S SMOKY WOODEN LEG
In this episode, Chandler dates Ginger — and we soon find out two things: 1) Joey’s dated her before, and 2) Ginger’s got a wooden leg. We find out later in the episode that things didn’t end well for Joey and Ginger — he accidentally threw her wooden leg into a fire!
We knew we had to include a smoky factor in this week’s beverage, inspired by Ginger’s (unfortunately) smoking wooden leg. Hence, the stick of cinnamon we lit on fire in order to flavor our signature beverages! We took notes from the Wake n’ Bake cocktail — rye whiskey, coffee, maple syrup — and put our spin on it.
There isn’t too much food to talk about in this episode, aside from the Chinese takeout that Ginger and Chandler enjoy on their (very) short date. Too bad the rest of the date wasn’t as delicious as their meal!
What’s this?! Is Leslie wearing the exact same retro-dice necklace that Phoebe wore in the Season 2 finale? Why yes, she is! We’ve decided that the two of them bought these matching necklaces back when they were best buds. Go ahead - try to convince us otherwise.
In other girls’ fashion news, Rachel looks sexy-cute in a floral nightie, Monica’s terrible dress has migrated down into a skirt, and Phoebe goes from lavender to bright green in the blink of a smelly cat’s eye. Monica later dons some lovely velvet, then finishes off the episode in a very Mod Squad look.
We kept getting distracted by Chandler’s choice of date-wear — a zip-up shirt topped with a sports jacket. Huh? Joey’s sweater is … inexplicably bad. It’s like Monica’s terrible orange dress flung itself off of her body and wrapped itself around its new host: Joey.
A JINGLE BITCH ALERT
We’re treated to some more of Phoebe’s backstory in this episode — turns out, she used to be singing partners with Leslie (guest star Elizabeth Daily), but the two of them had a falling out when Leslie sold out and went to work for a big ad agency. But Leslie’s back and wants to be friends again. After a lot of convincing, Phoebe decides to give their friendship another shot.
Things start off pretty well, with the gals getting along splendidly and writing more music together. Then Phoebe plays “Smelly Cat” for Leslie, and Leslie falls into jingle-mode and thinks it’d be great for a kitty litter ad. She goes behind Pheebs’s back and pitches the idea to the folks at her old ad agency. Phoebe tells her she has to choose: their friendship, or “Smelly Cat.” Unfortunately, Leslie chooses the song!
Luckily for us, Phoebe is inspired to write a new song:
“Jingle Bitch screwed me over!
Go to hell, Jingle Whore
Go to hell, go to hell, go to hell…”
A TOXIC BOYFRIEND ALERT
Ross, when will you ever learn? Apparently, not this week. This time around, Ross is jealous that Rachel is planning on going to a fashion seminar with Mark, who recently quit working for Bloomingdale’s. Ross pretends to be interested in the seminar, just so Rachel will go with him instead of Mark.
Ross falls asleep at the seminar, and eventually embarrasses Rachel by very noisily coming to during the session. They have an argument about crossing the line from being a supportive partner (e.g., attending an archeological lecture in a freezing auditorium) to being a possessive jerk (e.g., ROSS).
Rachel has a heart-to-heart moment and says that she’s happy with her new career, and that it’s separate from her relationship with Ross — it’s entirely hers. He says he’s okay with it, but he’s clearly not.
THE ULTIMATE NUBBIN ALERT
Chandler meets Ginger while waiting in line for the men’s room, and it turns out that Joey already had relations with her! As if that weren’t bad enough, we discover that while Joey and Ginger were staying in a cabin in the woods, Joey accidently threw Ginger’s leg in a fire and then ran away!
What Joey did was truly terrible. You have to stick around and man up if you throw someone’s artificial appendage on a fire. It’s just the polite thing to do! Chandler tries to get comfortable with all of this, but in the end, it’s Ginger who can’t handle a little quirk about Chandler — his nubbin! The two of them started making out, but when her wandering fingers came across his third nipple, she quickly made a point to wander out of the apartment — and Chandler’s life.
Sick of his third nipple hindering his love life, Chandler gets himself a little nubbinectomy. “Two nipples, no waiting.” Having missed the obvious “Rachel was a slut in high school” reference that joke made, Chandler fears that, in getting rid of his nubbin, he’s inadvertently cut off the source of his comedic powers!
OTHER STUFF WE TALKED ABOUT
Chandler looks a lot like Michael Keaton in this episode!
Elizabeth Daily is the voice of Tommy Pickles on Rugrats! Now you won’t be able to NOT hear it!