Elizabeth’s “I Swear to Do Better” Jar for Season 3 (through Episode 16):

$21

S02 E16 - TOW Joey Moves Out

S02 E16 - TOW Joey Moves Out

AKA TOW Tattoos and Twinkies

OAD: 02/15/96

SIGNATURE BEVERAGE: TWINKIE MARTINI

Rumors are flying that Richard’s dating “some 20-year-old Twinkie in the city.” We know that it’s not a bimbo, it’s in fact our little Monica, finally happy and finally in a real relationship.

The word “Twinkie” is uttered seven times throughout the episode, and that was plenty of inspiration we needed to make this week’s signature beverage.

We utilized another blogger’s Twinkie martini recipe, which features whipped cream vodka, vanilla rum, amaretto, heavy cream, and — hello — frosting!

Bring on the Twinkies!

FOOD

We’ve got an epic brunch spread at Monica’s — bagels, tomato, cucumber, orange juice, cream cheese, smoked salmon — we want to come over!

At Jack’s birthday party, we’ve got to dole out some Continuity Kudos — there’s a delicious-looking strawberry shortcake that makes the rounds throughout the episode, at various levels of readiness. It starts off in process, and Monica loses her whipped cream a bit while trying to decorate the top. We next see it on a side table, fully decorated, with candles ready to be lit. Lastly, it’s grandly brought into the kitchen with everyone singing “Happy Birthday” to Jack after a particularly awkward encounter with Monica and Richard.

On the podcast, we mentioned Elizabeth’s recipe for strawberry shortcake with a lavender-balsamic reduction. Check it out here!

FASHION

RACHEL

OMG these plaid pants on Rachel! Another epically classic look from our favorite fashionista! The only other outfit she wears this episode is her signature top-down overalls (with belt, of course) and a military-esque long-sleeved top with white stars. We love the structured stitching on the shoulders!

THE GUYS

The guys are wearing complementary black and white plaid robes (get your own here!). Ross is wearing — glory be, who knew this was coming? — his signature purple-green plaid, and Chandler looks quite handsome in a sage green squirtleneck and very pleated khakis.

FUN

TATTOOS

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Phoebe and Rachel are going to get tattoos! But uh-oh, we find out that Ross doesn’t approve! What will Rachel decide to do?

Cut to the tattoo parlor, where Phoebe is momentarily distracted from her plan to get a lily by a particularly charming Foghorn Leghorn tattoo.

Rachel’s still on the fence. She wants a tattoo, but what Ross said about it being a bad idea is bothering her. Phoebe’s not having it.

“Is this how this relationship is gonna work? Ross equals boss?”

Nice rhyming, Pheebs.

After they (supposedly) get their tattoos, Rachel shows Phoebe hers (a tiny heart that is — gasp! — not covered by sanitary gauze) and Phoebe shows … that she wimped out.

“He came in with this needle.”

“Really, you don’t say. Because mine was licked on by kittens.”

Back at the girls’ apartment, Rachel tells the gang how she finally got Pheebs back in the chair, the tattoo artist barely touched her, and she jumped up. Phoebe now has a blue dot on her upper right chest.

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“For your information, this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the Earth as seen from a great, great distance. It’s the way my mother sees me from heaven.”

Rachel’s pissed, shows everyone her actual tattoo, and that’s the moment when Ross walks in. At first, she’s a poor example of feminism when she buckles under the pressure of his judgmental gaze. But when he turns out to like it, it all works out. As it usually does in 20-minutes-of-sitcom-world.

TWINKIES

Monica’s dating Richard, which is awesome because he’s perfect, but also not-so-awesome because no one really knows. It’s a bit taboo, his being her parents’ best friend and all. It’s the day of her dad’s birthday party, and they’re all arriving together, so naturally she’s stressing about the least conspicuous way for them to enter the house.

“Monica, you could come in straddling him and they still wouldn’t believe it.”

By the way, did you see the mezuzah on the door? The Gellers definitely, definitely know they’re Jewish!

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Inside, Monica has to endure hearing all of the gossip surrounding Richard and his mysterious new girlfriend (no one but the gang knows about Monica and Richard at this point).

“I heard he’s got some 20-year-old Twinkie in the city.”

“So … Richard’s shopping in the junior’s section.”

Richard — because he’s perfect — deflects as much of the conversation as he can, vehemently denying this is just a fling with a bimbo. Jack won’t let up, though, and Ross begins his role for the rest of the day: fielding awkward situations for the Gellers, and providing some iconic comic relief for the audience.

“When I turned 50, I got the Porsche. You, you got your own little speedster. Maybe, one of these weekends, you can borrow the car, and I…”

“Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.”

Monica and Richard sneak off to the bathroom to regroup.

I’m a Twinkie!”

“Really? I’m a hero!”

And this, children, is why we need feminism.

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Richard leaves first, but Judy comes right around the corner toward the bathroom, so Monica has to hide behind the shower curtain.

Unfortunately, Jack comes in right after Judy and they two of them have a little … rendezvous. Luckily, Monica can somewhat muffle the noise using some questionable loofahs and sponges.

Jack and Judy return to the party with a pep in their step, whereas Monica is barely walking.

“You remember that video I found of Mom and Dad? Well, I just caught the live show.”

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Monica’s had it up to here with the gossip, and she overheard her dad saying that Richard had said he was falling for the woman he’s dating. She gets up the courage to tell Judy that she’s dating Richard. And Richard (perfection) has an adorably proud smirk on his face the whole time. We love you, Richard!

“YOUR daughter and Richard are something of an item.”

Jack comes in holding the baseball bat he’d been looking for, and Ross jumps into action.

“I’ll take that, Dad!”

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JOEY MOVES OUT

Joey licks a spoon and puts it back! We had a looooooooong discussion about this on the podcast — and we each have very different thresholds for when something needs to be run through the dishwasher.

The two attend a brunch hosted by one of Joey’s coworkers (a bit of trivia: the song playing at the beginning of the scene is on the FRIENDS soundtrack). The coworker tells Joey he should rent the apartment after he moves out. Chandler’s flummoxed, and confronts Joey back at their place.

“I saw the way you were checking out his moldings.”

Next, we’re treated to another Chandler-and-Joey-as-a-married-couple fight.

“I’ve already got an apartment I love.”

“It wouldn’t hurt you to say it once and awhile.”

The next day, they’ve made up, but Joey says he’s still moving out. They have another fight, this time over the foosball table.

“Your little men are going to get scored on more times than your sister.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoas, which sister?”

At the end of the episode, Joey actually moves out. It’s the end of an era. Joey running back in to give Chandler a hug gets us every time!

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MONICA’S CORNER

  • Joey says he’s 28 in this episode, but five seasons later in TOW Monica’s Thunder, he’s 31 years old.

NOT ON NETFLIX

  • Joey’s “Bye, you” to Monica (copying Ross and Rachel) and “good effort” handshake with Chandler

  • Phoebe: “I haven’t even gotten my tattoo yet and I’m already tougher.”

  • Phoebe: “Does it hurt?” and Rachel pinching her.

  • Chandler: “I’m aware that we are not gay puppets.”

  • The entire closing scene where Jack comes to visit Monica. “I went to go see your boyfriend … “You’re a big girl, I just hope you know what you’re doing.”

Apple Pie Martini

Apple Pie Martini

Twinkie Martini

Twinkie Martini